Sometimes I wish I could be like Krang...

You know him. The dude from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. You know, the living brain without a body? That way, I could just continue focusing on building up my brain, and not have to bother with such tiresome shit as... well, maintaing one's body.

I pulled a back muscle the other night while shopping for groceries. It was stupid, because it was entirely avoidable. I managed to forget something most self-trained body-building jocks never figure out: You lift with your legs, not your back.

So, now, I can't walk properly, have to go through convoluted positions just to get out of bed in the morning, or lift anything heavier than a cup of coffee (and even that with difficulty). At least I didn't pull my muscle by ghoddamned sneezing (which was what happened about a year ago).

Yeah, yeah, I know. I need to get into shape and shit (what, round isn't a shape?). But, for gosh's sake, I'm a code monkey. My work ties me to a chair for more than 12 hours each fucking day. And, really, it's such a bother, trying to maintain one's body. Or, as I just told Danes, my calorie-processing, weather-proof support infrastructure for algorithm generation.

Somebody figure out a way to upload a human brain to the Intarwebz, plz. And I mean RIGHT NAO. kthxbai.